ehhhh,nah,it's okayyyyy.
"He awoke each morning with the desire to do right, to be a good and meaningful person, to be, as simple as it sounded and as impossible as it actually was, happy. And during the course of each day his heart would descend from his chest into his stomach. By early afternoon he was overcome by the feeling that nothing was right, or nothing was right for him, and by the desire to be alone. By evening he was fulfilled: alone in the magnitude of his grief, alone in his aimless guilt, alone even in his loneliness. I am not sad, he would repeat to himself over and over, I am not sad. As if he might one day convince himself. Or fool himself. Or convince others--the only thing worse than being sad is for others to know that you are sad. I am not sad. I am not sad. Because his life had unlimited potential for happiness, insofar as it was an empty white room. He would fall asleep with his heart at the foot of his bed, like some domesticated animal that was no part of him at all. And each morning he would wake with it again in the cupboard of his rib cage, having become a little heavier, a little weaker, but still pumping. And by the midafternoon he was again overcome with the desire to be somewhere else, someone else, someone else somewhere else. I am not sad."
perfect huh?seriously.
we stepped into this together.i had your back and you had mine, or at least that's how it used to be.time passes, not that much of a time, but i guess it was enough to drift us apart.i found friends that uh,well,have to be close to me.and you?well you did too.only difference is it was your choice to bring them close to you.
the best melodies are the ones that gives you goosebumps,or make you cry in public or help you realize the answers.cause nothing else could give that tingly enjoyment feeling,than to touch those facile keys and make utterly divine tune out of it.the absolute commotion it gives to the heart.a boost of craving for the next piece. 
I suck on my thumb just for the secured feeling it gives. And no doubt i bite my nails, for no apparent reason. I'm sorry if that fact discomforts you. Ergo, proving i don't give a shit. :)
Sorry I didn't keep in touch that much. Sorry I hurt you. Sorry I annoyed you. Sorry I lied. Sorry you had to repeat what you said cause I wasn't listening. Sorry you had to wait cause I was late. Sorry i curse you behind your back. Sorry i talk bad about you on my blog. Sorry I replied your message late or didn't reply at all. Sorry I didn't pick up your call. Sorry i'm not always there to help. Sorry I ignored when you call. Sorry I blamed PMS for every mood swing i had. Sorry I snubbed when you smiled.
